I can make you shine...

If nothing else
he has sustained me
assisted me
in finding my worth
calls me out when
I run to the ones
that didn't know
what I had to offer
only took what I gave
without any payback
because that's what I do
run to the old
perform
relinquish my soul
to the familiar
and then rush to the next one
always searching
never finding

he pleads for me to
stop sending the emails
of apologies
for what?
things I didn't do
couldn't control
i'm sorry
for what??
persecute myself
and allow others to
do the same
why?
I'm going to need
for you to stop that

still he shows me
over and over again
that i'm worthy of that
divine love
that I dream about
and hope for

why not?
he's my remote control
turning me on
with no set timer
his words burn me
his eyes see right thru me
his hands glide over
every inch of me
erasing previous
attempts at love
unrequited

my channels still turning
from new to old and
back to favorites and the last one
going in circles
he inserts in his hand
and stops the cycle
please stop doing this
can't you see the damage?

why can't I stop myself
why can't I see me
he's my mirror
the past and the future
shows me everything
the things I can't see
the things right in front of me
i'm so blind with some things
others 20/20

pulls me out of
victim mentality
turns my loose bulb
when its about to go out
ignites my flame
when the fire gets low
covers me when I'm wet
and cold
left by the side of the road
abandoned and pushed aside
picks me up

he protects me
from them
he can't from him